If You Had to Rely on One Thing

Life has a way of throwing unexpected curveballs and presenting us with unexpected challenges and opportunities. It teaches us how to live through the many tasks and obstacles we each need to deal with to progress. If you had to rely on one thing in life what would it be? Life, Yourself, God, Goals, Philosophy, or something else? Luckily we can choose more than one, but for now, let's imagine we can only have one

Most of our ancestors did not have the luxury to consider this question, as they focused more on surviving their harsh environments. Perhaps they relied on their tools, weapons, tribe/community, or tradition, passed down to them from their leaders. It can be a difficult question to answer, yet we all have to answer it for ourselves at some point. When we seek guidance, direction, and meaning in our lives it becomes a crucial aspect of our decision-making.

There are unlimited options to choose from, each with its pros and cons. Let's compare some:

Life Itself

Relying on Life as a guiding force can be a challenging and unpredictable path. It's full of unexpected curveballs and obstacles, yet the opportunities are endless. One who is in sync with life tends to go with the flow, not allowing anything to derail them of course. They are like water, able to adapt to any situation. Like an improv actor able to riff off the actors and carry the plot along seamlessly without much context, so is the person who allows Life to guide them.

While it can be tempting to simply go with the flow and let life take us where it will, we still need a certain degree of control over the direction we take and the choices we make. At the extremes, you might imagine someone living in harsh conditions. They tend to be limited by their environment and cannot do much to stand out or make any choices unrelated to survival. Rarely are there people who succeed from nothing, except for the unique few who keep pushing through each challenge and obstacle without giving in to difficulties they face. Most tend to just go with the flow or give up. Nothing wrong with this, it's kinda forced upon anything living under a harsh reality, but we are more than our circumstances and we have the power to change the world around us. We have the option to assert ourselves and choose our path even if everything is preventing us from doing so.

So what if we rely on ourselves instead, seeing that we are unique and powerfully human?

Yourself

If you choose to rely on yourself, it means having the confidence to believe in your abilities and the courage to take risks while pursuing your goals. Also known for being self-reliant, you will be known as someone reliable who gets the job done since you don't rely on much else to solve your problems. You keep yourself accountable, responsible, and focused. You are known to be confident, success always seems to come your way. Best described as a sovereign individual.

It is up to you to put in the work and make things happen. It is also up to you to take care of yourself, your business, your family, and all your responsibilities. You can blame no one else for the current circumstances. It is in your power to take action and pick the direction you see fit.

However, this does not mean you have to go through life alone. Seeking support and guidance from others can be invaluable, and turning to a higher power or philosophical framework can provide an overall sense of purpose and direction to your life. Just like with going with the flow of Life, it can be detrimental to rely solely on yourself. It is important to find a balance that works best for you. Some may view it as selfish to be exclusively about yourself without any regard for anyone or anything else. Although you will be strong and confident as an individual, it can be difficult to travel far and high alone.

As fallible living beings, we are prone to making mistakes; at some point, we may look to something greater than ourselves.

God or a higher power

Those who believe in a higher power or call for direction in life rely on it to provide hope, purpose, peace, and community. God and Religion tend to be all-encompassing. Finding meaning and something to rely on won't be difficult here. The most common of our regions have churches, leaders, books, communities, and many pillars of support and guidance. Although some detest religions, I challenge them to argue against the fact that they are full packages that tick all the boxes and offer solutions to most problems.

Continuing with the theme of balance, remember that relying on God, a higher power, religion does not mean giving away your responsibility or agency. It is still up to you to be God-fearing, dutiful, and holy within your religion. Even in Christianity, where those who believe in Christ are saved automatically, they still have to be good Christians which requires tough choices and sacrifices. Belief, action, responsibility, proactivity, and many other values of religions are self-driven.

Perhaps we decided to kill one bird with one stone by focusing on One True Goal to follow.

One True Goal

Having something you are deeply passionate about and feel driven to pursue, then relying on it for guidance and purpose, can be a powerful and fulfilling way to live. It combines the benefits of self-agency (if you pick this goal yourself) and the higher purpose and meaning you may get from relying on God or a higher power.

A clear and compelling goal can provide focus, motivation, and a sense of purpose. You aren't easily distracted by the inevitable curveballs that most people get derailed by as you are focused on achieving one thing only. Everything leads to this One True Goal. You get to choose the scope and size of this goal. You get to choose your ultimate purpose. Life becomes like a game. Games tend to be framed around one goal or aim and scattered with some obstacles and quests along the way. In this manner, your life will become about this goal, and everything else will add or remove from it.

Like a compass pointing oriented around Earth's poles, your One True Goal will be the pole you orient your life around. However, it's important to rely on yourself and your abilities to take action and to make progress towards achieving the goal itself. Additionally, sometimes things don't go as planned, the goal wasn't worth it in the first place, or maybe the goal is unattainable. In these situations, you can supplement or replace your One True Goal.

A good supplement or replacement for a Goal is a System or Framework.

Philosophy

Last but not least is philosophy, another guiding force that can provide a solid sense of direction, purpose, and meaning. Like religion, it can be the full package you need to live a successful and fulfilled life.

Philosophies offer a tank of a framework for understanding the world and our place in it while giving you the freedom to think and make your own decisions. It can show how to live by certain values or principles and can go as far as to tell you how to eat, sleep, drink, walk, talk, dance, see, taste, hear, live, and die. Philosophy can be as complex, deep, and encompassing as you want it to be. You can even create your own if you are wise enough. Or combine them.

All this said, there is more to life than a framework, dogma, or individual. Life itself is far too massive, complex, and unpredictable to rely on One thing to get you through. I believe the most successful people have multiple sources of support and motivation, making them unstoppable forces.

All together, Other, or None at all.

As you already know, there are many things in life to rely on. It depends on your unique experience, values, beliefs, and goals, so no one is wrong about their choice unless it is wrong for them. Some choose to rely on nothing and may do just fine. "Why bother when life is so unpredictable or meaningless?" they might ask. Albert Camus may say life is too absurd to rely on anything.

Some other possible options might include career, creativity, personal growth, family, community, and a combination of them.

Conclusively, the most important thing is to find what works best for YOU and to rely on what aligns with YOUR values and goals. I encourage you to find out what that is and to be flexible in exploring the alternatives. You are powerful and have so much agency and freedom that it is impossible to imagine what you can accomplish. You are just as unpredictable and awe-inspiring as life itself. Some people may rely on you for their meaning, purpose, and guidance (shoutout to all the Parents, Leaders, Mentors, Teachers, Doctors, Soldiers, and reliable folk).

This article is here to celebrate this freedom of choice and self-agency.